Emily's New Year's Date

Here he is! Isn't he dreamy?

"Wow, it is difficult to describe myself without sounding conceited...I suppose that friends would describe me as very friendly, soft and cuddly. I'm a great listener because I have big funky ears. My long neck, big eyebrows and crooked smile make most people laugh. I enjoy laying around a lot, so football season is my favorite.

"Who am I looking for? I'm looking for someone who is really really ultra-stressed out with work and/or personal issues. I'm not opposed to emotionally disturbed people as long as they're not prone to tearing the innards out of stuffed animals. I'm not big into the gym, so if you like to lay around, watch movies or sports and nap, we might be a good match. Pucker up, buttercup!"

Merry Christmas!

Well, I'm excited to have some time off work to finish up shopping and wrapping, then to spend time with the fam in Dayton.

Of course I can't get away from work completely...I have several employee reviews and a self-review to do before end of year. Fortunately I can do these things from home in my jammies. Maybe with a glass of wine...then everyone would receive GREAT reviews...

I have a long to-do list for myself during vacation. I've officially started wrapping presents and I did laundry. Two things done out of about fifty...I should try to be more realistic about what I will actually accomplish!

I hope you have a Merry Christmas surrounded by friends and family. The picture here is a watercolor/Photoshop combo that features my children's book characters, Vivianne and Sparky.

I'll try to write more before the new year!

Christmas Shopping for Cripples

Do you know why I make fun of newspaper and direct mail ads? It's because they're my link to the outside shopping world!! Although my surgery aligned well with my health care spending 'knee cap' for 2008, it makes for a tough holiday shopping season.

It's the thought that counts, right? Wrong. I've personally witnessed abandonment of electronic gifts on my very back porch. My brother was re-attaching his truck cap after storing for a while in my garage. My soon-to-be sister-in-law picked up a tiny black thing from the truck bed. Brian nodded and gave it to Sam as a gift. She treasured it...fondled it...gazed at it. Sure enough, after they left, I found it sitting on the ledge of my deck - an abandoned electronic little gift.

If people won't accept gifts as valuable as electronics, what will they accept? I just don't know what the world is coming to. The little black gift also had a message of "I" and "O" on it...personalized! Who knows how long it took Brian to come up with that. Yet Sam left it like a beer can in my backyard.

I don't know how I'll meet expectations if black and white electrical devices aren't even worth taking home. I guess I need to look for something more colorful or stainless steel.

Ten Places Not To Wear This Hat

I came across this gem the other day. This 'handsome' and 'humorous' cap promises 'plenty of smiles from onlookers'. I know that if I saw this on my dear Grandpa's head, I'd probably giggle and shake my head, hoping that he didn't wear it in public. However, not all people are as sweet as my Grandpa. There's an inherent risk in wearing a hat like this. Here's my advice, directed specifically to senior discount-seekers considering investment in this cap...

Let's face it; not everyone gets along. Should you disagree with someone while wearing this hat, it could quickly become your worst attire decision of the day. If you happen to butt heads with someone who is paying through the nose for Social Security right now even though they'll likely never see a cent of it down the road, you'll want to back off about the 50-cent discount.

In an effort to keep the peace between seniors and others, I assembled a list of top five places/situations NOT to don this 'embroidered, not just a patch' yet 'comfortable' hat:

10.) Library: It's already free. It's like a slap in the face to the girl behind the counter as she scans your large-prints.

9.) Dining: Besides the obvious risk of spittage in your food, servers will know you're that lousy tipper at Table 32.

8.) Online Dating: If you happen to be single and looking for love, this hat is not flattering. Especially if you list your age as 45.

7.) Bureau of Motor Vehicles: With this big target on your forehead, BMV employees will insist on an eyesight re-test.

6.) Job Interview: Cracker Barrel might foresee a potential connection between you and patrons, but not many other hiring managers will view this as a plus.

5.) State or Federal Court Proceedings: You won't want to be discounted here, particularly as senile.

4.) House-Hunting: In the market for highly contested house or condo? This hat will put you out of the running in a hurry.

3.) IRS Audit: This hat won't exactly scream 'I'm clean' in the interview.

2.) Religious Services: First of all, this hat does not entitle you to a reduced offertory donation. Plus, you'd hate to cause so many other seniors in the congregation to covet thy neighbor's cap.

1.) Surgical Procedures: Fortunately, if you're the one on the table, they require removal of all clothing/accessories prior to surgery. Maybe because they saw too many 'Don't Forget My Senior Discount' caps.

ACL Surgery

After tearing my left ACL during a highly competitive dodgeball tournament with co-workers (yes, I'm serious), I scheduled ACL replacement / reconstruction arthroscopic surgery through my ortho. It's been almost a week since my surgery. The surgeon used a cadaver ACL to replace my torn one...that seemed a little weird at first. Of course a month ago I joked with my ortho to 'find me a good one' and he said they only use ACLs aged 18 years or less. Okay, bad joke. (How sad.)

The recovery is going well. I'm hobbling around now without crutches, which is good since I fell over last week trying to use them. The fam took great care of me during the Thanksgiving holiday weekend. My new ACL seems to be getting along well with the other ligaments so far...the MCL and PCL have welcomed the newcomer with open...er...well........fibers.

A bit of good news...I've officially hit my annual out-of-pocket maximum expenditure for the year. The MRI, the physical therapy and appointments with the ortho pretty much did me in. This means that most surgery, drug and physical therapy expenses will be no charge to me since I already hit my 'spending cap', as some people call it. I call it my 'knee cap'.